anew

the number of cherry pits
lying around her desk
will tell you just how many cherries
she's devoured today

her delight in the sweetness
that lingers in her mouth
is not something that can be
easily taken away

the sunlight in her face
makes her squinch her eyes
but she has to admit the warmth
is hitting her at the right spot

it's aslready noon
and nothing's been done
how can she stop
a day that's already begun?

she wishes to smile
the same way she has
when her heart was whole
and free from old shame

can she rewrite her life?
can she start again?
rip out the old pages
and start anew?

Yes, He says.
For new wine needs new wineskin.
And you are now new.

I make all things new.

Heidi Baker
Iris Ministries, Inc.
Pemba, Mozambique
5 April 2007

Years ago I had a vision of Jesus surrounded by a multitude of children. Jesus looked at me with His intense, burning eyes of love, and I was completely undone. He told me to feed the children, and I began to cry out loud, “No! There are too many!” He asked me to look into His eyes, and He said, “I died that there would always be enough.” Then He reached down and broke a piece of flesh out of His right side. His eyes were so magnificently beautiful, yet His body so bruised and broken. He handed me a piece of His flesh, and as I took it and stretched my hand out to the first child, it became fresh bread! I gave the bread to the children and they all ate. Then He put a simple poor man’s cup next to His side and filled it with blood and water. He told me it was a cup of suffering and joy, and asked me if I would drink it. I drank it and then started to give it to the children. It became drink for them. Again He said, “I died that there would always be enough.” Since that day I have taken in every orphan child He put in front of me, and have asked my co-workers to do the same.

This is my beloved appa.
whom i take for granted so much.

He has always been a healthy man.
but last Sunday the devil attacked him with dizziness during his first sermon.
He rebuked it and it went away.
then on Tuesday, he was getting off the church van after lunch and suddenly blacked out.
He doesn't remember, but he fell to the ground and hit his head against the alsphalt corner.
as a result, his right ankle is broken and he got stitches 4cm long right above his right eye.
I'm just thankful he didn't hurt his eye, or nose, or teeth, which could have been so likely, and much more serious.

i don't know what the devil's planning, but he's scared that appa is doing great things for God's kingdom.
not a chance.

Because he is likely to faint again, and his ankle is broken, he's been sitting in a wheel chair.
This past thursday he had to get all these checkups at the hospital so mom and i took him there
and i pushed him in his wheel chair all day long.
and realized, those things are not as easy to move as they seem
and that Korea is a horrible place for disabled people to live.

I mean, the crappy hospital bathroom had a special stall for the disabled
but the bathroom entry itself from the outside was almost impossible for a wheel chair to go in.
I started appreciating the bathrooms in america.
and the people here are so indifferent it seems
in the hospital, everyone cares about their own business, their own health,
they have no emotional room to even consider others.

while it is a bit of a tragedy that it happened, and it really isn't that serious,
i have to admit, it has made me appreciate my father more than i usually do.

and i actually feel useful to him. which has never really happened.

since he can't stand up and walk, and he can't stand not doing anything,
he constantly asks me to get him a sermon tape or this book or his glasses from the bedroom.
and i go get it for him like a good daughter should.
and it feels so odd to know and feel

that he needs me. he actually needs me.

wow.

My dad is always in a hurry. he talks really fast. he walks really fast too.
but that day in the hospital he could only go as fast as i could push him.
and I have to admit, his bossyness about it gets on my nerves sometimes,
but it felt good. to be so close to him for so long.

i can see on his face though,
he doesn't like being dependent
for every daily activity that we all take for granted so much.

they say it'll take 6 weeks for his ankle to heal
and for the dizziness to go away he needs to swim

so please pray his ankle heals soon and he'll be back on his feet in no time.

funny how this experience has changed the way i view bathroom stalls and family.

lovely

we looked for ways to celebrate
to affirm our significance on the surface of a lonely planet
(and to be sure we do not know the weight of our own significance)
there were fireworks and hotdogs and beer
and we drank and were merry and those of us that
choose to be kinder to animals just smiled at the hotdogs
and to be sure we do not know the weight of our own significance
occasionally we feel it in our chest and it is frightening and heavy

when the dawn awoke, all of our words turned to dust
and floated gently away in the breeze
sleeping, we really are deep inside these lovely bodies
waiting to be awakened ourselves

by dannyk622

he's got a talent with words. and with melody.